Giving robots a bad name since 2007.

Merlin: The Wicked Day
Oh, it's wicked, all right.
Merlin: The Darkest Hour, Part 2
Arthur sacrifices himself for Camelot... almost.
Merlin: The Darkest Hour, Part 1
Morgana unleashes a ghost army on Camelot.

Hot Guys With Swords, What Else?

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You may have heard us mention Michael Fassbender on the podcast before. He was Lt. Archie Hicox in Quentin Tarantino's Inglourious Basterds. Recently, he is rumored to have been offered both the roles of Magneto, and the villain in the new Spider-Man movie. But, as Laura has pointed out -- mostly, he is very attractive.

Which leads me to our segue... Centurion. When I originally got the press release, the only name I recognized was Dominic West's. Also, it looked like yet another sword-and-sandals in the woods flick that had little to hold my interest. I mean, 300 was great the first couple of times around, but I don't really need to see it -- or a watered down version of it -- again. (Centurion stars two actors from 300, which is how I jumped to the conclusion.) And I avoided Baskin & Robin Hood at all costs.

Then I did some digging and found out there are lot of hot guys in this movie, and I hope to hell they get half naked, but from the looks of the trailer: No. Not even a decent beheading (but a lot of slit throats.) So if you're in the mood for some desaturated yelling and stabbing, hit the jump link for a synopsis, the trailer, and a neat little photo gallery I put together of attractive people.

The year is AD 117. The Roman Empire stretches from Egypt to Spain, and East as far as the Black Sea. But in northern Britain, the relentless onslaught of conquest has ground to a halt in face of the guerrilla tactics of an elusive enemy: the savage and terrifying tribes known as the Picts.

Quintus, sole survivor of a Pictish raid on a Roman frontier fort, marches north with General Virilus’ legendary Ninth Legion, under orders to wipe the Picts from the face of the earth and destroy their leader Gorlacon. But when Virilus is taken captive, Quintus faces a desperate struggle to keep his small platoon alive behind enemy lines, evading remorseless Pict pursuers over harsh terrain, as the band of soldiers race to rescue their General, and to reach the safety of the Roman frontier.

From writer/director, Neil Marshall, Centurion is a gripping survival thriller set against a background of conquest and invasion; a pursuit movie in the vein of Deliverance, Last of the Mohicans and Apocalypto.

You got that? Cowboys, Indians, and Mexican Indians.... IN ENGLAND, BOOSH. After watching the trailer, I get the impression this is a lot more like Saving Private Ryan mixed with Braveheart, but what do I know, I'm not the fancy press release writer who accidentally sent me the same press release three times with a "MY BAD!" email later.

Anyway. The movie premieres on XBOX and Amazon.com on July 23 and opens in theaters August 27, 2010. Apparently other countries are looking forward to it a lot, because when I went to put together a mini hotness gallery of actors that are Geektress approved, I stumbled across a lot of Danish and German sites that are ALL OVER the Centurion news. Plus this interview with David Morrissey (whom I personally find very attractive) at Screencrave:

It’s all action sequences: all I do is run around, fighting, and riding horses. My character is one of a team of seven who are trying to escape and the Scottish Picts are after us. My character is basically Michael Fassbender’s right-hand man really and that was a great job to do, very physically draining but I loved every minute of it.

So, bonus, we get to see two hot guys doing hot things hotly, or at the very least, hot things in a cool-colored film palette. (Seriously, when did the memo go out letting everyone know that historical England had no white balance?) Below are thumbnails, if you click to embiggen, you will understand why we appreciate looking at these people. (The last two are simply appealing shots of Fassbender and Morrissey from Inglourious Basters and Viva Blackpool, respectively.)




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Comments (7)

michael:

Umm..yeah, I'm done with all this making of ancient conquests as well. And, though only barely scratched, what Gladiator did on this similar subject, was enough for me.

Like the 80's and vampires, this too is getting out of control.

PBMonkeyKing:

But what about vampire gladiators who time travel to the 80's?

Vampire gladiators should time travel to the 80's and fight off a Russian invasion.

michael:

lol, you two!! :D

Alex:

Neil Marshall of Dog Soldier and The Decent fame is directing this?

Sign me up.

Tyr:

This needs more vikings.

Most things do, Tyr. Most things do.