I Can Has Science?

Merlin: The Wicked Day
Oh, it's wicked, all right.
Merlin: The Darkest Hour, Part 2
Arthur sacrifices himself for Camelot... almost.
Merlin: The Darkest Hour, Part 1
Morgana unleashes a ghost army on Camelot.

Justice League: Secret Origins Part 3

Previously on Justice League, a bunch of stuff that I already recapped happened.

Somebody is repairing that satellite dish that was damaged in the first episode. Somebody else asks him if he hooked it up right, because the readings are off the chart. Then there is a report from Snapper Carr that more invaders are coming and it's roughly five times the size of the first landings. Senator No Nukes wants the public to remain calm. Has no one picked up on the fact that maybe the astronaut who had something weird happen to him on Mars, then came back to Earth, became a senator and got rid of all the nuclear weapons is maybe in on the invasion plan? Batman obviously does not follow politics. Anyway, people aren't remaining calm. They are looting. Wonder Woman and Martian Manhunter look on from a rooftop, and Diana wonders if her mother was right and mankind really is just a bunch of untamed savages. J'onn tells her that they act out of fear and she shouldn't be too hard on them. I think Diana's probably closer to being right, but then some biker looking guys try to get help some trapped kids. Green Lantern comes along to save them.

Green Lantern and Flash then meet up with Wonder Woman and Martian Manhunter. J'onn and Diana catch them up on Superman and Hawkgirl being captured and Batman being dead. Green Lantern declares it "Not good." I think we figured that one out, John. They're going to try and rescue Superman and Hawkgirl, but J'onn warns that they have to do it quickly because the Imperium, the supreme intelligence that controls the invaders, is coming.

Flash draws the fire of the white, three-legged invader thing until he gets it to blow itself up. Assume that there is much quipping. Wonder Woman, Green Lantern and Martian Manhunter fly into the hole in the factory that Superman made in the last episode. J'onn leads them to where Superman and Hawkgirl are being held and Flash catches up with them. On the way, they overhear some of the invaders. J'onn assumes the form of an invader and talks to them while the rest of the JLers stay out of site. He sends the two invaders over to where the JLers are, but then he takes them out by phasing his arms through them and resolidifying while still inside their chests. Flash is creeped out and I can't say it's not warranted. They forge ahead.

They reach some walls and Martian Manhunter senses that the POWs are somewhere behind them, so GL starts to cut through them with his magic ring. Outside in the city, it's like a big earthquake with the ground trembling, buildings crumbling and people running for their lives as the Imperium floats overhead. Fortunately, the JLers have finally broken through the wall and have found Superman and Hawkgirl hanging upside down. Unfortunately, it's a trap. The wall seals up behind them and the room fills with gas. Also, it wasn't really Superman and Hawkgirl.

Now everyone is being held captive with that muck Flash got trapped in before. Superman wakes up J'onn by calling to him and tells him that they shouldn't have risked their lives to save them. Then the invaders show up to taunt the captives and make a supervillain speech. Surprise, surprise Senator No Nukes never really returned from Mars. Superman's all indignant because they used him as part of their plan, failing to note that had he been less arrogant, that wouldn't have been a problem. Then the Imperium shows up and they hail it. The Imperium is a big blob with a pink and purple outline and tentacles. It immediately starts to torture J'onn, because I guess you want to get the guy you already know out of the way first. This actually gets pretty sick. After J'onn turns back into a naked, pointy headed Martian, the Imperium digs its tentacles under his skin. Then the tentacles keep moving further through his body, but always just under the surface of the skin. Then he gets absorbed into the Imperium. He's screaming the whole time, and who can blame him?

J'onn continues to resist though and refuses to submit and admit defeat. The Imperium senses a secret deep within the recesses of J'onn's mind. He wants to know what it is. That's when Batman bursts out of the red pod that contains the ion matrix crystal. J'onn psychically shielded him so that he could not be detected by the invaders. Everyone is shocked. I am too. I really thought they were going to kill off Batman. All the red in the factory starts to turn blue, like the walls are filling up with water, but that's not what's actually happening. That's just what it looks like. Batman has reversed the ion charge. I don't know how he does it, or how he even knows how to work the alien technology, but I suspect the answer to those questions is that he's Batman. The invaders try to destroy the crystal but it's shielded. The factory then shoots a big blue beam at the sky which clears the big, grey, sun blotting cloud. The sun shines into the factory and the invaders melt. Then J'onn bursts out of the Imperium and pulls the Imperium by the tentacles that are still attached to him into the sunlight too so that he can slowly melt as well. It's pretty badass.

Batman frees the heroes and then they set out kicking the ass of the invaders that haven't melted. They also make a bunch more holes in the factory so that they can melt more invaders. J'onn continues to fight the Imperium, but he eventually breaks away from J'onn and gets back in his ship to escape. Wonder Woman manages to lasso the ship. J'onn is out though and Superman rescues him from some attackers. Wonder Woman loses her grip on the lasso, but Hawkgirl manages to slow the ship's assent by beating the crap out of it. Wonder Woman catches up with it and their combined efforts send it crashing back into the factory. Flash saves Batman, who is right underneath the falling ship fighting some invaders. Said invaders go splat.

Superman starts to rescue the people that are in red pods like the ones we saw in the first episode. Flash helps even though he's grossed out by the slime they are covered in. Martian Manhunter is recovered and beats on some invaders. Hawkgirl proclaims that "The whole place is going to blow," so Green Lantern evacuates the rest of the formally pod-people with his ring bubble while Superman and Wonder Woman fly out of there with Flash and Batman respectively. As they make it to safety, the factory explodes, the big mothership that the Imperium initially arrived in before descending to the factory in the smaller ship, which got smashed into the factory, flies off into space, and the sky clears. The JLers stand on a rooftop and look on heroically. Did I mention that the whole big climactic battle that took up most of this episode was awesome? Because it was totally awesome.

Snapper Carr reports on how Superman and the other heroes are getting rid of whatever remaining invaders that are left. The general who was smart enough to know that getting rid of all the nuclear weapons and relying solely on Superman to protect the world from everything was a bad idea back in the first episode thinks they need to be prepared if the invaders ever return. Batman thinks about this. Then we see a big space station.

Inside, we see Superman looking down at the Earth. He asks Bruce if his stockholders know about this and Batman tells him that it was a line item hidden in the aerospace R&D budget. That seems sketchy to me. One would think that the cost of building a space station would be big enough that it would cause people on the board to notice. I think the Wayne Tech, or whatever, stockholders need to vote in new board members. Clearly they aren't doing their jobs properly. Batman tells Superman that this "watchtower" will act as an early warning for any other threats of invasion, but Flash is more impressed by the fully stocked kitchen and the iced mochas. With a "Mmmm. They don't have these on Themyscira," Wonder Woman notes her own approval of iced mochas, and I really must agree on their goodness.

When Green Lantern and Hawkgirl float on in, GL notes the impressiveness of the installation, but wants to know what it has to do with them. Superman then makes a big speech about how he thought he could protect the world by himself, but that working together they saved the planet. "[He] believes that if [they], stayed together as a team [they] could be a force that could truly work for the ideals of peace and justice." "What, like a bunch of superfriends?" Flash asks. Superman prefers Justice League. Flash thinks it's corny, but that it's a good idea. Everyone's in, even Diana, despite the fact that her mother wouldn't like it, but Batman passes. He tells them that they can call him when they need help, and assures them that they will need it. Batman: more arrogant than Superman? You be the judge.

Finally, Wonder Woman notices that J'onn isn't there. Superman flies off to find him alone at some control panel looking thing, looking out into space. He broods that he has lost his family and is the last of his kind. Superman tells him that he knows the feeling, but he really doesn't since he didn't actually see his entire race get exterminated and has no memory of his family. J'onn isn't really listening anyway as he continues to brood that "Mars is dead and [he is] alone in the universe." Superman tells him that they can't replace his family, but they would be honored if he would call Earth his home. J'onn seems to like this and smiles. They turn and presumably head towards the rest of the group.

And that is how you make a kick ass superhero show people. The kicker? Season one isn't even the good season.

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